HastyQuestions to ask a pen pal (and what to write in a letter)
8 October 2026 · Hasty
The short answer: ask questions that can’t be answered in one word: about their day, their place, their favourite things and the stories behind them. End every letter with one or two of them, and you’ll get long replies back.
How to start a pen pal letter
Open warmly (“Dear Ana,” or “Hello from Lisbon!”), say where you are and what’s around you as you write, then answer whatever they asked last time.
Questions to ask a pen pal
About their everyday life
- What does an ordinary day look like for you?
- What can you see from your window right now?
- What’s the first thing you do in the morning?
- What do you usually eat for breakfast?
About where they live
- If I visited your city, where would you take me first?
- What’s a sound or smell that means home?
- What’s the weather doing today?
- What’s something tourists get wrong about your country?
About them
- What’s something you’ve changed your mind about?
- What’s the best thing you’ve read, watched or heard lately?
- What’s a small thing that made you happy this week?
- What are you looking forward to?
Deeper questions, once you know each other
- What’s a place you’d love to see before you’re old?
- Who taught you something you still use every day?
- What would you do with a free year?
Writing letters to friends
The same works for friends you already know: describe one moment from your week in detail, tell them something you’ve noticed about them, and ask a real question. A long letter once a month says more than a hundred quick messages.
How to end a pen pal letter
Ask your questions, then sign off: “Write soon”, “All the best”, “Until your next letter”. A short PS is always welcome.
Write it on Hasty
Hasty is a pen pal app for adults where letters travel the real distance between you, so there’s time to write properly, and time to look forward to the reply.
Letters that take the long way
Hasty is a slow, calm pen pal app for adults, coming soon to Android. Be the first to write.
More guides
- What to do instead of doomscrolling
- Left on read: why it hurts, and messaging without read receipts
- Should you delete Instagram? How to keep friends without social media
- How to make friends as an adult (without dating apps)
- The dead internet and AI slop: why we built Hasty around letters
- How to spot a pen pal scam (and stay safe writing to strangers)
- What is snail mail? Happy mail, mail art and why letters are back
- Stamp collecting for beginners: philately, postmarks and postcard collecting
- Slow living: calm apps, analog hobbies and less screen time
- Feeling lonely? Gentle ways to feel less alone
Questions people ask
What should a pen friend letter say?
A pen friend letter should say where you are, something from your day, an answer to their last questions, and new questions back.